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My Cold Cold Heart

This week David Bowie died. I heard the news and felt sad, sad for his family and those that loved him. I was amazed to hear how many people adored him and his music and how those people felt his loss deeply. David Bowie was of an era I should appreciate, I certainly loved watching Labyrinth.

I started to wonder why I didn’t feel his loss as deeply, one of my thoughts was that we are left with his music, he leaves those who loved it a great gift. I was not a fan, I enjoyed some of his music, but it did not touch me deeply, it didn’t have a lasting impact on me.

Thinking more about it I realised that as a teenager I tended to listen to older music, the artists I admired were either already dead or had long since stopped recording. I never experienced the anticipation and excitement of new music being released. I also enjoyed music, but was never a fan if that makes sense. I never felt an emotional bond to those that made it, I just enjoyed their talent.

When I was a teenager I loved books and films and theatre. I still do. I love actors who can bring my love of books alive, who can make characters even better than I’d ever imagined. It is a rare talent. Alan Rickman was one of those actors. I just heard that he died too this week. I was shocked to hear the news and I cried. I found myself needing to write straight away, to get my feelings down.

I am so sorry for his family, their hearts must be breaking.

I understand a little better those that really felt the loss of David Bowie, they were moved by his work as I was moved by Alan Rickman’s.

I am glad I am left with the wonderful films he was in, everything from Die Hard to Harry Potter. Now I am going to sit and watch one of them and I will feel grateful that he existed. I feel reasured that my cold heart can be melted, that I am not so strange, I just feel a connection to something difference.

RIP David Bowie and Alan Rickman. You will both be missed.

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