Mistakes made without awareness while raising children
Do you think your child is more special and clever than other children? Do you want everyone to know that your kid is very smart? Are you treating your child as if he/she is the most valuable asset in the world? If so, you are inside the group who are raising narcissistic children.
The researches of Ohio State University and the University of Amsterdam on children of ages of 7-11 have very interesting results. According to these researches, parents who believe that their children are the more special and are superior to other children cause the growth of narcissistic characteristics in children.
People with narcissistic characteristics tend to exaggerate their achievements and abilities; they do not accept any criticism; and empathy is impossible for them. Researchers say that children, who are raised with warmth and appreciation, see themselves as valuable individuals and develop self-confidence. However, giving the message that children are superior to other children does not just develop self-confidence, but also it leads to the development of narcissistic traits.
Parents convey the messages of ‘I am always right, ‘my desires are my priority and must be done immediately’ by just saying yes to every request of their children and shaping their lives according to their children. They believe that when their children grow up they can get everything they want. In fact these children will also see themselves always right and superior to others. For this reason, they can have difficulties in their relationships and business life.
Individuals who are really self-confident are aware of their weaknesses as well as their strengths and respects to the rights of others and care about emotions and thoughts. So what if we want our child to have a solid self-confidence, to respect the rights of others, and to be a responsible individual?
Phycologists offer the parents to identify the limits of freedoms of the children exactly. Every child needs rules and regulations according to their age and level of development. Show that your child is loved, respected and is valuable whether he/she is successful or not. Even if he/she is not successful, you appreciate his/her effort. Never compare your child with other children. Do not do all the work for him/her and give him/her responsibilities.
If you give unlimited options to your child, it will be difficult for her/him to decide because of being unaware of what is right and what is wrong. That is why we should not leave authority to young children and have boundaries for them.