I Miss Beautiful Underwear
I adore underwear. I have a large bust so have trouble finding decent stuff that fits and is pretty. I don’t spend much money on clothes but I always did spend money on underwear and it has to matching. Years ago I discovered Rigby and Peller underwear and never looked back, it was pricey but stunning and so flattering it was worth every penny.
When I was pregnant with my last baby I managed to get some M&S non wired nursing bras that I wore through my pregnancy and then when breastfeeding. When I stopped breastfeeding most of my beautiful underwear no longer fitted, I got some cheaper sets which were OK but not fantastic. Then we decided it was time for another baby and I was back to the non wired bras.
The bras are hideous. There’s no other word for them, they give no shape or definition to my breasts and make my 34H boobs look even bigger than they are. The ones I have do not come in matching sets (I really am a stickler for matching underwear, it upsets me being mismatched. One of my favourite underwear related moments was when the female paramedic cut my leathers and clothes off after I crashed my motorbike and congratulated me on the fact that I had beautiful matching underwear on!). I have one set of matching nursing underwear, it can be seen on my bump photos, but it actually offers no support and doesn’t really fit properly.
My partner took a photo of me in the garden earlier, I had been feeling quite good about myself, wearing my newly purchased jeans (without an elasticated waist!) and a t-shirt but I looked awful because of the terrible bra under my top. After that I felt a bit deflated and fat to be honest. I want to breastfeed the baby for as many months as he needs me to, certainly until he is weaned onto solid food, but I do hate the thought of wearing this dreadful underwear until then. It seems silly that it bothers me, but it does. It would never stop me breastfeeding but I do wish there was an answer. Clothes look better with decent structuring underneath and when you have a 34H bust the structuring is definitely needed!
I think 2 babies close together makes it feel a bit worse as I feel I’ve had years of this underwear now and I’m bored! I want prettiness. I want to feel sexy. I want my partner to see me looking hot in my matching underwear (though to be honest I could wear a hessian sack and he would think I’m sexy, he currently has a fascination with my fat bits around my middle, he is a strange man). At the same time I remember how quickly this first year goes, before I know it my precious tiny baby will be celebrating his first birthday and I will miss this bond we have. I only have this time to feed him with the milk my body miraculously produces, before I know it he will be a big boy and he will never need me in the same way again. I will whinge and stare longingly at my beautiful underwear but then I’ll remember why I can’t wear it and will manage to put it away for another day.